It is finally raining here.
After a month of waiting and seeking,
They are here, all dark and gloomy.
And with such a weather has come the reclusive guest,
One who visits me far too often and inconspicuously at best.
My friend, the Depressive Grief,
One who renders me speechless everytime he visits.
Like literally. Mouth shut, lips totally sealed.
He comes this time with a list of problems,
And thrusts that in my face with a wicked smugness.
As if I didn’t know ’em already and hadn’t been keeping me awake at night.
He sits back with a laid-back attitude, as if to challenge,
See, you have failed yet again to fight back.
You’re a failure and a total loser, just admit that!
This time, I don’t argue back however.
For he has come at the best time to strike at me,
When my claws are rusted and have been long drawn back by me.
He keeps on striking at me, leaving me bloody-backed,
He grows more angry, when he sees me numb and not fighting back.
He grows tired eventually and sits back with a sigh,
Damn, you have really conceded defeat, ain’t that right, man?
I look back at him with tired eyes and dark circles beneath,
Simply give a sigh and a shrug, heaving.
He opens the door and leaves me alone,
Looking back at me, he says,
You used to be different for sure, before.
With a sigh, he looks down and looks back at me again.
Float, dear friend. Do not let yourself get down and drown.
I whispered, I’m a dead body, can’t you see?
I’m drowning and will float only when,
My energy is all gone for everyone to see.
He gave a tight smile and said before leaving,
Well, that just means darling, you still have the will inside to live, isn’t it?
With him long gone and the rains still falling,
I glance back at the dark and gloomy sky and wish.
Wish that I can hold my breath under the water and not drown,
For there are still many people relying upon me,
I still cannot drown.
I cannot drown.
So instead I choke back my tears and face the curtains of Life.
I gotta live. I have to live.
Till the time I can help those people come to the shore,
Till then, I will live.
I will live.
NightSoulWhisperer 